Monday, September 06, 2010

A Stephen Colbert rally to Restore Truthiness to America!

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Caricature of Stephen Colbert
Stephen Colbert, American Hero
[source: Stephen Colbert Rally]

I’m sure you all remember two Saturdays ago when Glenn Beck, bastard child of Josephs Smith and McCarthy, held his 8/28 “Restoring Honor” rally at the very same date and location (plus some 47 years) where Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his own “I Have a Dream” speech. Well, sure, that’s all good and well, but … what about the truthiness?

Some clever dickens on Reddit by the name of mrsammercer had this divine inspiration: We must hold a Restore Truthiness to America rally!

I was woken in the middle of the night by this(along with the sound of my cat getting ready to pee on the rug).

Think about it. It'll be just like Colbert's mockery of GW Bush at the 2006 White House Correspondent's Dinner, but 500,000 people will be able to participate with him. We'll all stay totally in character as teabaggers. The kid with the microphone that interviews all the idiots at these things can come by and we'll ramble into his microphone.

This would be the high water mark of American satire. Half a million people pretending to suspend all rational thought in unison. Perfect harmony. It'll feel like San Francisco in the late 60s, only we won't be able to get any acid.

I know you're out there somewhere, Stephen, watching LOLcat gifs along side us. We need you. There's no way to have a logical public discussion with the teabaggers. The best we can do is to mimic them. Show them a mirror and hopefully some will realize how ridiculous they actually are... Or maybe they won't even realize that they're being mocked, which could be even more awesome.

The movement even has its official website:

America, we are at a crossroad. Truthiness in this nation is at an all-time low since the inception of the concept was founded by the great American, Stephen Colbert. In its rich history over the past five years, Truthiness has become synonymous with American values such as freedom, honor, and Taco Bell. Recently our nation has suffered a truthiness drain. In fact, untruthiness is as common as measles vaccinations that cause cancer. We as a nation have stopped relying on our emotions and gut. We need to get back to what makes this nation great. Act on impulse not fact. Stop wasting time analyzing and just take what people say on face value. Why think when someone else can think for you. It’s superficial. It’s quick. It’s American. Restore Truthiness now!

There’s a potential problem, though, where the fact that conservatives consistently, almost deliberately, fail to realize that Colbert is satire will make it so that most of the crowd will take the whole thing very seriously, which would most likely result in an onion-shaped matrix of irony upon irony that could tear apart the very fabric of the space-time continuum, thereby ending the Universe as we know it!

Or, it would just be fun to watch, regardless of potential world-ending scenarios. Be sure to set your chronographs to see how long it takes before the genuinely wingnut portion of the crowd slowly begins to understand the nature of Colbert’s act.

Don’t be surprised if it never happens.

(via Dispatches from the Colbert Report)