Thursday, April 29, 2010

Trashing sophomoric Greg Gutfeld

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Greg Gutfeld
“Hey, c’m’ere, lemme give you bad examples of humor and argumentation”

Greg Gutfeld, host of Fox News’s Red Eye, has already been the focus of this blog’s scorn once or twice due to the fact that his preferred method of debating or arguing is resorting to ad hominem swipes so remarkably pathetic that they make part of your brain shut off and die. Now, just for kicks, check out what his grand riposte is to San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom for banning official city travel to Arizona and declaring that the state’s new Draconian anti-immigration law is “unacceptable”:

Which leads me to explore what Newsom finds acceptable:

Exhibit A: Turning the world's most beautiful city, San Francisco, into a sprawling toilet with a half-billion dollar deficit.

Being S.F.'s mayor should be a dream job. It's like being King of Gumdrop Village on Rainbow Island. It's packed with great food, tourists, amazing scenery and fun people. But Gavin has left the city oilier than his own pompadour. If one block doesn't smell of excrement, it's because it smells of feces and vice versa. Gavin has taken a jewel of a city and pooped all over it.

Which leads me to:

Exhibit B: Letting panhandlers rule. I'm from the Bay Area, and spent a lot of time wandering S.F.'s streets, either working or drunk. Now, no way.

The last time I was there, my 85-year-old mom was surrounded by the most aggressive panhandlers I've ever seen — walking over others, apparently napping. Instead of worrying about the potential ramifications of a law in another state, Gavin should address the heaps of humanity that litter his own streets.

Exhibit C: Banging your pal's wife. It's true, Newson slept with the wife of his close friend and campaign manager, who then resigned. Maybe there aren't enough women in S.F., but you're the mayor and you've got hair. Either you're too lazy or you lack character — probably both.

Bottom line, Gavin: Before you crap all over Arizona, clean up the crap in your own yard.

Now, first of all, I will admit to knowing very little about the state of sanitation in San Francisco, and a Google search didn’t provide any useful info. So, I cannot judge whether the city actually is a few steps short of a sprawling pigsty such as Gutfeld claims.

However, even if Frisco is a filthy hive of litter and panhandler-infested streets – which I will allow myself to doubt somewhat strongly, given Gutfeld’s record of veracity thus far – so what? Is that really the best Gutfeld can do? Instead of taking Mayor Newsom to task over his declaration that Arizona’s new anti-immigration law is “unacceptable”, not only does he support that travesty of a law (as most conservatives do, naturally), but his best comeback is comprised of lame poop jokes, insulting Newsom’s (perfectly fine) hairstyle, and finishing with some more juvenile attacks on the guy’s character.

I know how petty it seems to devote a blog post to something as insipid from an idiot like Gutfeld, but this was just too amusingly ironic (and pathetic) to pass up. Greg Gutfeld is the last person who should even consider telling others off about their dirty linens.