Didn’t we already go through this nonsense?

Maybe they should use a red-colored Chiller font instead

Before you ask: no, we haven’t just zipped back to 1994. It’s just the same stupid story on a different day:

A woman in Oregon has sued her local McDonald's franchisee after spilling hot coffee from the drive-thru window on herself. She claims that the coffee was too hot and the lid too loose, and seeks $7,500 in damages.

According to the suit, "as it was being handed to her by an employee of the defendant, the plaintiff took the cup of coffee and the plastic top fell off and spilled very hot coffee on plaintiff's upper right leg..."

She went into "nervous shock," endured pain and has scarring. She seeks $7,182 for her pain and suffering, plus another $318 for lost wages and medical expenses.

Okay, first of all, I’m rather skeptical about her (lawsuit’s) claims about having gone into “nervous shock”, and I find it especially hard to believe that whatever injuries she may have had merit a lawsuit of nearly $7.5 thousand. If you’re too stupid or clumsy to be able to handle a cup of hot coffee – which couldn’t be labeled as “hot” any clearer – without burning yourself, you shouldn’t order it in a drive-through. And if you’re actually dumb enough to choose to sue the restaurant for you burning yourself with your own coffee … then you’ve got issues. I wouldn’t sue Home Depot if I hammered my thumb like an idiot. Same principle, here.

Her lawsuit is dead in the water anyway; there’s no way anyone will giver her squat, not since a previous lawsuit of the sort ended with coffee cups being labeled loud and clear as “caution: hot”. It would be equal to suing the makers of a step-ladder because you stood on the little shelf, itself labeled as “NOT A STEP”. Thankfully, the report has a poll with answer choices that pretty much accurately reflect how one should feel towards such a lawsuit:

What do you think about the merits of this lawsuit?

Burns hurt. Give the lady her money. – 15% (913 votes)
Hot coffee is hot. Deal with it. – 85% (5,380 votes)
[Results taken at 3:20 PM]

Bingo. Or, better yet: just be careful. And if the worst does happen, then don’t sue the freakin’ restaurant like a dumbass. It ain’t their fault you spilled coffee over yourself.

(via Fark)